Coffee shop, Croissant Madness, ABC Tour, JUPGITF, JUHAB

5th February 2017

I am currently sat in a lovely coffee shop in Bristol. Cappucino to the left of me, notepad to the right, laptop in the middle, feeling good. I often come to this coffee shop. Not just because of the coffee (it’s great coffee, but not the best), but because of the people, and the space, and the art, and the staff. I thoroughly enjoy the lack of nonsensical coffee jargon that would normally make me feel intimidated and overwhelmed. You know, this kind of conversation: 

 

Me: “Could I have a cappuccino please?”

 

Barista: “Sure thing. Which coffee would you like?”

 

Me: “Eh?”

 

Barista: “Would you like our Euthopean blend which is infused with goji berries and essences of Cornish sea breeze? Or our Italian roasted bean which has hints of cress and peanut butter Kit Kat?”

 

Me: “I’ll just have whichever tastes the most of coffee, please. Whatever you suggest, professor.”

 

Barista: “Excuse me?”

 

Me: “Do you have any biscuits?”

 

Anyways, I came into this delightfully simple coffee shop to write this blog. I asked for a croissant. They had no croissants. But they always have croissants. I know, but not this time! I was flabbergasted (perhaps an over exaggeration, but I just like the word!). The manager explained that they don’t serve croissants anymore because every week somebody would choke on a croissant and die! So they first changed the place that they got their croissants from. Same again, someone would choke and die!!!! They ended up trying 7 different croissant businesses. But again, every week, someone from the coffee shop would choke and die. I asked the other barista “Exactly how many people choked and died from croissant related injuries in the coffee shop”. She said replied “None”. But still no croissants!!! Madness. At least these kind of shenanigans don’t happen in the real world. 

 

Pastries aside, the ABC Tour Kickstarter has 2 days left. We have raised £798.00 out of £3500.00. It ain’t looking good! But that is ok. We will keep moving forward. Thank-you to everyone that did pledge to give some money. You are stars. We have both learned a lot from doing this Kickstarter and we are going to try and find another way of doing the project. It isn’t dead yet! In the words of Rocky Balboa:

 

 

Talking of which, I am going to be performing my solo show, Jon Udry Punches Gravity in the Face, soon. I am performing it in Salisbury on the 22nd Feb

 

http://www.salisburyartscentre.co.uk/whats-on/festivals/jon-udry-punches-gravity-in-the-face/

 

and in Trowbridge on the 23rd Feb:

 

http://trowbridgearts.com/index.php?option=com_zoo&task=item&item_id=481&Itemid=273

 

Hopefully see you there!

 

Also, I have started working on my new show called Jon Udry Having a Ball. Info about that coming soon, or when I have it.

 

Thank-you for reading. Bye for now. J x

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Upcoming Gigs

Mon, 10/07/2017 to Thu, 13/07/2017
Algarve, Portugal
Wed, 19/07/2017
Burnham-on-Sea, UK
Fri, 21/07/2017
Tivoli Theatre, Wimborne, Dorset, England
Mon, 24/07/2017 to Thu, 27/07/2017
Ibiza

Testimonials

"Juggler, standup comedian, and with a Faustian earned ability to defy the laws of gravity (unsubstantiated, but seriously... how else?), Jon Udry brings a stage show to make any circus ringmaster weep into his lion's mouth. Honestly, the man is like a mix of Bez and Magneto - big-fish-little-fishing his way around the impossible and back again.

Birmingham Review of Swingamajig 2016

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